Category Archives: events

XBiz Awards & Upcoming Conferences

Remember when I shot that incredible porn with Pink and White Productions called “Occupied” about a protestor from the Occupy movement who has a romantic interlude with a cop? Well, it won 2014 Feminist Release Of The Year from the XBiz Awards! What a way to start the year! As my usual pedantic self, I rambled on about why I love Crash Pad and why this win is important within the context of porn production over at their website. You can tell it was in post-production for awhile just from the length of my hair which is now mucchhh longer. It was obviously worth the wait!


This film was an incredible shoot, one of my all time best performances, and a marker of incredible growth for me. I got take on some material that was close to my heart and play a character who was close to me and far, far, far from the image of a glamorous porn star. It was fantastic! When I was making this film, I was excited to do something hardcore that played off the tensions I was seeing and experiencing in Oakland. I wasn’t thinking about feminism so much as I was thinking very broadly about power and my relationship to it. It was great to take on a project where women occupying the traditionally masculine roles of protestor and cop weren’t treated as the punchline or end game. In your standard ‘lesbian’ fare, we wouldn’t be costumed anywhere near authentically. Usually those scenes are about ‘how cute she looks when she’s pretending to be in a position of that much power” which has its own appeal, trust, but gets old when that’s all you’re ever allowed to perform or see. There’s a lot of rich material to play from, we don’t have to get trapped in the same angle.

All my love to the Pink&White crew for always putting together a welcoming set, mad technical skills, a hot vibe, and great working conditions. I also want to encourage you to check out what Pink and White is up to because they’re going to keep getting bigger and better. They’re making waves in the world. I also want to say that I’m honored to have been in this category with other great directors and producers who are also doing cool things in porn. XOXOXO!


Shibari Dojo Vienna

Shibari Dojo Vienna


I’ve also been accepted as a speaker for the 2014 Feminist Porn Conference in Toronto, April 5-6. I’ll be talking about the advent of moving picture pornography. We think of feminist-indie-queer porn as being an alternative to mainstream porn, but how did those norms become established and just how alternative is alternative porn anyway? This year I didn’t submit any projects for the awards because 2013 was the year I felt properly christened into my name “Mayhem.” I’m happy to come in and be the nerd I am and share some of the smut from great-grandma and grandpa’s attic.

You can also come see me at Theorizing The Web 2014 in Brooklyn, April 25-26. This conference is pay-what-you-can so please come out to see some fantastic presentations out in Brooklyn. I’m really happy to be on the lineup because this conference went out of its way to solicit presentations from sex workers and is being accessible in every way it can. It’s going to be hosted in a Brooklyn warehouse and I am always SO THRILLED when I get to speak in non-conventional environments.


I’m interested in other speaking opportunities so please let me know if I should send an abstract to YOUR favorite conference. Let people know you want to see MAYHEM on the stage. I love challenging topics and I want to come to your local anarchist info shop, sex toy boutique, avante garde porn screening, death salon, sci fi panel, or dungeon discussion. If you get enough people together in your living room and feed me vegan eats, I’ll even come talk in your living room. True fact.

Shibari Dojo Vienna

Shibari Dojo Vienna



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Link Love


Bawdy Storytelling Photos by Neuoptik Photography

Masters of psychedelic art: My household growing up had a lot of Peter Max and I always enjoyed the bright tertiary colors and flowing lines. Not surprisingly, art that appeals to someone tripping also appeals to kids. Although a lot of folks might want to decry this genre because of its illicit associations there is a tremendous amount of skill and theory applied here. It’s worthy of study and appreciation in all states of consciousness. It’s also had a massive impact on popular art since its inception.


No fap isn’t a challenge, it’s a way of life.” As a logical counterpoint to Reddit’s constant stream of ‘fap material’ is a forum of young men dedicating their time and energy to not fapping as a new take on the old idea of preserving masculinity by abstaining from masturbation.


100% Men is a Tumblr dedicated to depicting companies and corporatations whose leadership is 100% male.


The Mysterious Island Of The Dolls in Mexico is creepy and compelling to look at.


Men should read Hegel before dating is a short video from the coming documentary “Monogamy and its Discontents.”


High school student calls out Pam Stenzel for slut shaming. Her school principal is a total tool with bad ideas on educating teens who engages shaming behavior of his own. Wellesley welcomes their incoming student after the debacle over Twitter. I wrote about Pam Stenzel in 2009 after bearing a grudge from having to watch her horrible “Sex Has a Pricetag” videos in junior high and high school. Pam Stenzel is a lying liar who lies to teens about sex. She makes students feel bad about themselves and their sexuality. May she be known for what she is. I wrote about Stenzel in 2009.


Salvador Dali’s wife Gala was known as the “demon pride” and is said to have outdone him with her own set of sexual perversities, megalomania, and lust for cash.


The Revolution Will Not Be Funded is an anthology that questions the impact of the non-profit industrial complex on enacting social change. I think it’s crucial to consider this and I’ve certainly had my own clashes of this nature.


The Mating Octopus in photos. For all you cephalopod lovers out there.

ImageTriptychs by Mattie Brice explores labels and labeling through the lens of gaming and other personal identifiers. As always, she’s brilliant voice in the gaming community and radical bloggers at large.



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Tracy Clark Flory, Ned, and YOURS TRULY will be the judges for the AIR SEX REGIONAL happening in San Francisco tonight. As a professional pervert and pornographer, I am super excited to watch the action and decide who gets a GOLDEN BUTTPLUG or a SILVER DILDO.

So come one, come all and pick a song and start humping the air!

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Feminist Porn Awards 2012

The 2012 Feminist Porn Awards are just kicking off in Toronto, and as a new startup we are very proud to have two nominations in the mix less than a year from our launch. The Feminist Porn Awards, run by the awesome sexy ping center Good For Her, are the premier showcase for alternative, queer, progressive work in the adult industry. Since they began in 2006, the awards have featured the work of many of our role models including Shine Louise HoustonJiz LeeTina Horn, Courtney Trouble, and Tristan Taormino. We are honored to be acknowledged alongside these awesome folks and many others, and we were counting on the publicity to promote some really hot new content we’ve been working (and screwing) hard to produce.

Imagine my surprise this bright and sexy morning when I woke up to this rather unsettling email from Verotel, the credit card processor for Meet The Mayhems. The email informs me that our account is now subject to a €500 fee, which they assume we cannot afford, so they have been kind enough to terminate our account for us. You can read my rant about this here if you’re interested. To have our credit card processing yanked without warning only a few days before the FPA award ceremony is a serious and unexpected challenge.

Financial douchebaggery aside, the bottom line is that we can’t take your money for a few days. Does that mean that we’re going to deny you the incredible sexiness you’ve come to expect from us? Hell no! You awesome perverts mean more to us than that. It’s time for a whole long weekend of FREE PORNO! 

Running our own small, homemade independent porn site together has been a challenging but rewarding experience. Over the past year the two of us have built our own small business completely from scratch. We make up for having next to no investment capital by pouring our own time and skills into the project. The result is a true DIY porn site where everything from web development to editing to accounting, shooting, legal issues, photography, and marketing is done in our little Oakland apartment by the Mayhems ourselves.

Naturally there has been quite a steep learning curve in many of these professional skills, but we started small and have learned by doing. We ask our customers for only $8 per month, significantly below the industry standard price, with the caveat that a bad flu or a business trip might interrupt our schedule of updates. The quality of our product has grown steadily over the past year, and our membership has been slowly growing with it. We are now poised to launch innovative new sections of our website including homemade adult product sales and written erotica, and we have agreements with other independent adult performers and small studios who want to launch their own small porn sites using our software architecture. We are working not only to create an independent income stream for ourselves, but also to create a viable business model for all of the little guys in porn who want the tools to profit from their work without sacrificing their creative and entrepreneurial autonomy.

We’re excited to share some of the fruits of our labor with you free, for a limited time. Enjoy, and stay tuned for tons of new footing in the coming weeks, including performances by Wolf Hudson, James Darling, Ruby Reaper, Denali Winter, and Bianca Stone!

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Upcoming Events!

  • The Feminist Porn Awards 2012 are upon us! Both Ned and I are so honored to have received nominations for our website, MeetTheMayhems.Com as well as for our first feature length flick, Tresspass. Grab tickets to see the awards or cheer us on by checking out the livestream by Girlzporn.

The Feminist Porn Awards takes place April 20th at 9 pm at the Berkeley Church at 315 Queen Street East, Toronto, Canada. Live streaming will commence at 8 pm E.S.T (6 pm P.S.T), kicking off with live interviews with talent in attendance and their spectacular red carpet entrances.

What’s it like to be a queer or kinky atheist? Alt-sex communities might favor calling the goddess or tantric rituals instead of a church revival, but the belief that a spiritual life makes you a better person is as common as in Middle America. The reality is that for nonbelievers, dungeons and Pride Parades can be as unwelcoming as the neighborhoods they grew up in.

Godless perverts of all stripes are encouraged to join us at the Center for Sex and Culture on Thursday, April 26 to explore the role of atheists, agnostics, and skeptics in alternative sexuality. The panel features Greta Christina, Charlie Glickman, Chris Hall, and Maggie Mayhem speaking about how to be a good perv without God(dess), community attitudes that privilege religious and spiritual beliefs, how science can be ecstatic, what atheists call out when they come, and much more.

$10-20 sliding scale
The Center for Sex and Culture
1349 Mission Street between 9th and 10th Streets

  • Farmhouse Conference 2 is happening in Hollywood, CA on May 5 and I am thrilled to have joined the lineup. No slides, no projector. Just awesome people telling incredible stories. The theme this year is “Mapping” and the lineup is becoming more and more awesome by the day. My talk will be called Navigating The Gender Landscape. 



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EVENTS! Bawdy Storytelling & Threshold at Mission Control

I am a last minute addition to the Bawdy Storytelling event happening TONIGHT, Thursday December 15 at the Uptown in Oakland, CA. The theme is WINNING! and the story lineup looks fantastic.

Thursday, December 15th (Special Holiday date)
Doors at 7, Stories at 8
$10 at the door

The Uptown NightClub
1928 Telegraph Avenue
Oakland, CA

Stories by:

Sarah Dopp is obsessed with the Internet, microphones, the overlapping edges of gender, and the kinds of adventures that make for a really good story. She accidentally lived in China, she drives to the Grand Canyon on a whim, and she recently learned how to make ice cream. Sarah likes to build communities, and she’s created thriving ones around genderqueerness, writing, and performance — both on the Internet and right here in San Francisco. She’s been published in Coming and Crying and Gender Outlaws: TNG, and has a history of co-hosting of San Francisco’s Queer Open Mic. But lately, she’s just been kinda normal.

Jonathan Moore-Northrop spent his first thirty years telling blue stories in a red state. In 2008, he relocated from Phoenix to San Francisco in search of like-minded leftist homosexual perverts. In collaboration with artist Chris Kelsey, Jonathan is the creator of the webcomic, which is relaunching in January.

If Kitty Stryker was a My Little Pony, her cutie mark would be a pen crossed with a sword. She is a sex worker who writes about filth and politics for Good Vibrations, Filament, and Artwank, among other publications. In her copious free time, she’s head of the queer Ladies High Tea and Pornography Society, founder of Kinky Salon London, and a devotee of enforced feminism. Kitty blogs about her professional and personal experiences at

Mandy Hixson is a San Francisco native who started attending Burning Man at 17. Most recently she has been traveling around the world and occasionally performing – burlesque in Istanbul, fire dancing in Bangalore and and inadvertently a sex show in New York. She is now very happy to be back at home in the city of queers and pervs.

Blythe Baldwin is a writer, poet, & visual artist. As an outspoken & unapologetic queer she spreads a sex positive outlook through the arts. She has featured at The San Francisco Queer Open Mic & performs regularly in the Bay Area. She spends her nights writing & drawing comics.

Maggie Mayhem is a writer, performer, and sex hacker who lives an underground Oakland lair that is a hub of sex positive technology, art, and activism she shares with her partner Ned Mayhem. You can find Maggie at her home on the web, MissMaggieMayhem.Com or on Twitter.


Come out to my fabulous play party at Mission Control in San Francisco FRIDAY, Dec 16th from 9PM-3AM. We have tons of fungeon play space, a hot theme about uniforms and anti-uniforms, sexy decor to get you in the mood, great people to meet, and some sizzling entertainment. Come out and rock your socks and enjoy comedy by MORGAN at 9PM and the band BOBBY JOE EBOLA at midnight.

I can’t wait to see EVERYONE there! If shiny boots get you salivating and you think that uniforms were made to be fucked in, make it a point to come out to THRESHOLD.

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The Road To Shameless

Maggie’s Note: I’m reposting this amazing event at the Center For Sex and Culture TOMORROW NIGHT, 11-15-11 in San Francisco. If you’re in the area, go check it out and support sexual assault survival storytelling.
(This announcement contains references to sexual assault and recovery.)
Dixie De La Tour, Bawdy Storytelling and Stories 2 Stop Rape
present a one-night only performance by National Story Slam Champion Nancy Donoval:
A Survivor’s Tale of Sexual Assault and Healing

 Written and performed by Nancy Donoval
“[Nancy Donoval] has mastered the art of telling stories that are
funny and heart-wrenching at the same time.”
- Chicago Reader, Critic’s Choice
Advance tickets at:
7:00 – Doors Open
7:30 – Show Starts
Q&A follows the performance.
The Center for Sex and Culture
1349 Mission Street, San Francisco
“Nancy’s story is as much for men as women.
Beautiful, difficult, heartfelt stories — this show is a gift.”
- Kevin Kling – Playwright, NPR Commentator, Author of The Dog Says How
Flat Rate Tickets:
$12 advance / $15 at the door

Sliding Scale Tickets
Pay What You Can Afford $5 – $25 (advance and at the door)
No one turned away for lack of funds.

Listen to Nancy’s story slam-winning excerpt of
The Road to Shameless on Chicago Public Radio at:

“An experience of exhilarating liberation! There are so many
people in my life that I want to hear this story.”
- Elizabeth O’Sullivan, audience member
Tickets at:
Whether survivor, friend or family many of us struggle with how to talk openly about sexual violence. The issue can become even thornier when survivor and assailant know each other. Nancy Donoval was a 19-year-old freshmen theater major when she went out for a night of fun and drinking and was sexually assaulted by a friend.  She knew what had been done to her was awful, but she didn’t know to call it rape. Like a lot of people, she thought sexual assault meant a stranger in a dark alley, not someone you trust in a place you thought was safe.
Today, Nancy is a critically acclaimed performing artist specializing in performance memoir that finds humor in the hard stuff of life such as grief and loss, body image, disability and sexual violence.  Nancy won the 2010 National Story Slam Championship with an excerpt from The Road to Shameless, her one-woman show that turns the experience of being a sexual assault survivor into powerful, transformative public art.  This witty, compassionate tale speaks the unspeakable with humor and grace making what might seem too difficult not only bearable but, in the words of one audience member, “an experience of exhilarating liberation.”
“Like the best storytellers, [Nancy Donoval] transforms the events in the telling and
ultimately arrives at a deeply meaningful hope.  [Told] with self-deprecating
wit and quirky insight…profoundly moving.”
- William Randall Beard
Minneapolis Star Tribune
More than an account of a sexual assault, The Road to Shameless puts rape in the context of Nancy’s life as a daughter, sister, girlfriend, theater artist, and budding activist. Using her skills as a storyteller, she gently invites us into key moments in her journey of survival: wearing overalls to erase any sign of being a girl; acting in plays with her assailant after the assault; finally being given the word ‘rape’ for what was done to her by someone she was dating–while they were sitting on his bed and he was lobbying for sex; how friends and family reacted when she told them; and the long twisting path from denial and silence to recovery and healing and eventually to becoming an outspoken voice for change.
Artful and wise. This is pitch-perfect storytelling, witty as the
best stand-up comedy but with a brilliant structure that
delivers the audience to its dead-serious heart.
- Patricia Weaver Francisco
Author, Telling: A Memoir of Rape and Recovery
Last month, as part of her work as a sexual violence educator for college campuses (, Nancy took this show back to where it happened, meeting with and telling her story to current members at the fraternity house where her attacker had lived and the assault took place. It was a powerful experience for all involved and highlighted the need to tell and listen to difficult stories such as these if we are to change our culture to embrace both “Yes” and “No” without shame.

“I learned there was hope and humor and healing somewhere in the hell.”
- Kenzie K., Augsburg College
“Nancy tells a story filled with meaning and has somehow found
a way to use humor in a discussion about recovery from violence.
Her words are powerful, revealing and ultimately healing.”
- Roberta Gibbons, Asst. Professor
Violence Prevention and Intervention, Metropolitan State University
For more info on Nancy and her programs:

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